Still too tired and sleepy to make a decent article, so I'll just be posting one regarding my "sembreak adventures" later, after I've had my beauty sleep.

Anyway, I'm gonna post a half-baked entry which I've written weeks ago to keep you occupied.

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First off, some thoughts about love. This is just too "bothersome" to pass up.

I just read an entry in a blog written by someone (you know who you are) about finding your ideal mate (or "the one") and about settling for someone less than your "the one".

Because you see, for me, finding an ideal mate or someone that is "the one" for you is all complete bullshit.

Yes I know my dears, I have, from time to time christened someone as "the one" and have expounded somewhat on the possibilities that "the one" is actually my "The One". However, in the "final analysis" (quoting a high school classmate), you can't find "the one" because there is no "the one".

There is only someone whom you find complements who you are, who can bear all your idiosyncrasies, and who you can bear all his/her idiosyncrasies.

How is that all different from someone who is the ideal mate?

Well, no matter who we are, where we live, and what we do, we've all painted a picture in our heads on what our ideal mate looks like and who he/she is as a person. And it is based on this pattern that we rate members of the opposite/same sex, however subconsciously we do it.

Obviously, all the qualities we look for are positive. Excuse me for being frank or for being politically wrong, but in reality, we don't want our partners to be serial killers, spoiled brats, slobs, idiots, or butt ugly. We don't want them leaving the toilet seat up, talking with their mouth full, leaving their teabags all over the place, or sitting on the white couch buck naked (SATC fans can understand me).

Reality knocks though, as each person in the world has this "thing" that does not conform to our standards and somehow bothers us in some weird fashion.

And so after the ultimate high that is called "being in love" where all we see in the other person are the right things ("he's so sweet", "he's such a gentleman", yada, yada, yada) and we hit reality wherein infatuation has ended, we begin to be bothered by his/her idiosyncrasies that didn't even bother us before (i.e. before: it's so nice to hear her high-pitched voice; after: it's damn irritating to hear her bopek voice).

Here is where choosing to love someone comes in.

Note that this is very different from "falling in love" aka infatuation.

Choosing to love someone is loving an individual unconditionally. You do not categorize, nor nitpick. You love the person for the whole person, including those things that he/or she does that drives you crazy.

If I am to be strict about my arguments, this person will obviously not be "the one". This, I guess, is what some people would refer to as "settling".

Since no one is full of goody-goody qualities without a few rough edges here and there, there is no ideal mate for anyone in the world (remember my definition of the ideal mate earlier?). And so, in effect, if we define "settling" as settling for someone less than "the one", then everyone, as in everyone, will be settling, since "the one" is really just in everybody's heads.

I therefore propose that we do not use the word settling; rather I think we should refer to it as "finding someone, falling in love with that someone, and deciding that you will love this someone for all that he/she is".

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Somewhere, in all of that, I think I've made a flawed argument, but what the hey, cut me some slack.

I was sleepy when I wrote this.

Anyway, catch you guys later.